The Big Bran Hypothesis - S1-E2
Sheldon: Oh Gravity, thou art a heartless bitch.
The Bat Jar Conjecture - S1-E13
Sheldon: At this point, I should inform you that I intend to form my own team and destroy the very bonds that bind your very matter together and reduce the resulting particulate chaos to tears!
Leonard: Thanks for the heads up.
Sheldon: You're welcome. [Turns to leave.] One more thing,
Leonard: Yes?
Sheldon: It's on, bitch.
Sheldon: Every Saturday morning since we've lived in this apartment, I have awakened at 6:15, poured myself a bowl of cereal, added a quarter cup of 2% milk, sat on that end of that couch, turned on BBC America and watched Doctor Who.
Leonard: Penny's still sleeping.
[Sheldon stares at Penny for some time.]
Sheldon: Every Saturday since we've lived in this apartment.
Sheldon: I was analyzing our lie and I believe we're in danger of Penny seeing through the ruse.
Leonard: How?
Sheldon: Simple: If she were to log on to SoCal physics group.org forward slash activities forward slash other, scroll down to seminars, download the PDF schedule, and look for the seminar on molecular positronium, well then, bippity boppity boo, our pants are metaphorically on fire!
Penny: Sheldon, have you any idea what time it is?
Sheldon Cooper: Of course I do. My watch is linked to the atomic clock in Boulder, Colorado. It's accurate to one-tenth of a second. But as I'm saying this, it occurs to me that you may have again been asking a rhetorical question.
The Fuzzy Boots Corollary - S1-E3
Raj: Tonight I spice my mead with goblin blood.
The Luminous Fish Effect - S1-E4
Sheldon: Pleased to meet you, Dr. Gablehauser. How fortunate is it that the university has chosen to hire you, despite the fact that you've done no original research in 25 years and instead have written a series of popular books that reduce the great concept of science to a series of anecdotes, each one dumbed down to accommodate the duration of the average bowel movement. Mahalo.
Leonard: I already lied. Why cover it up with another lie?
Sheldon Cooper: Because your lie was painfully transparent, whereas my lie is exquisitely convoluted. While you were sleeping, I was busy weaving an un-unravelable web.
Chosen answer: It does. The variable cleanliness of the cab and the habit of taxi drivers to engage customers in small talk would be too much for Sheldon to handle, and not an option for him.
Captain Defenestrator